Community

Tomorrow’s Thanksgiving. You know, that day we sit around the table, eating too much food, and conjure up some words of gratitude? Then, we fall asleep with our pants unbuttoned, dirty dishes in the sink, and ponder where to put the Christmas tree.

But, for that one moment, that day of communal thanks…we’re reminded of all the great things in our lives.

Last weekend, I had a friend visit me from the states. He got to see the life I’ve been living here, on Paros. Now, I don’t know if it’s just me who does this, but when someone close to me is out of their comfort zone and experiencing something about my life, I tend to put myself in their place. I begin to hear words as they might. See surroundings through their eyes. In doing so, I’m able to get a glimpse at something that I might have been overlooking.

For example, my visiting friend, Russell, and I were walking down the same street that I walk everyday to class. He stopped and turned down a pathway that I’d never really seen before. I followed him up the steps, and there was this beautiful marble castle. I guess I’d noticed it while walking before, but I’d never really stopped to take it in. It was remarkable. The same thing happened later on, when we spent some quality time with my new friends.

The group up at the Temple of Apollo

Everyone roaming the grounds of Artemis and Apollo

Listening to Cameron talk about Apollo and Artemis

The group went up to see the Temple of Apollo and have lunch at this beautifully secluded house in the hills. The 360 view of the island was mouth-dropping. Adorned with quirky fixtures and collections from all over the world, this obscure building felt like a home. We sat around the fireplace, ate delicious food, napped, told stories, sang, laughed. It was perfect.

Talking around the patio table, after lunch

Gorging on the delicious home-made food

There was a moment when I sat and took it all in, trying to see what Russell might be seeing. I watched Lynne do impressions, making everyone laugh hysterically. I listened in as Marcus gushed over the delicious food we were eating. I smelled the wood-burning fireplace, crackling next to the sleeping Catherine. The room was filled with friends. Happy, joy-filled friends. People, who were complete strangers less than 3 months ago, were now joined as if they’d been mates for life. The amount of gratitude and love in that warm, little room was immaculate.

I realized something, then.

There is such a need for fellowship and community. A need for relationship. Conversation. People who, though aren’t always like-minded, will make you think. Believe in yourself. Laugh about struggles. Dream about passions. All of these quintessential ideas are surrounded by the people who ignite them.

Whether it’s on a Greek island with totally new friends…or at home, in your dining room, with the family you’ve always known. This community of loved ones is the most necessary thing for us, as humans. I’m not sure if I’d have realized the community I have here, had I not taken a step back to evaluate things from the new perspective of my friend.

Tomorrow’s Thanksgiving. What do you have to be thankful for?

Nostalgic in Naxos

Just got back from Naxos, another island in the Kikladhes.

It was beautiful. So many mountains, and it felt a lot more Greek. In the sense that there were a lot more residential areas that we got to explore through. In doing so, we met lots of locals and went into more "Ma & Pop" cafes and stores.

Here are some pictures from our trip:

Our yummy lunch on Naxos

How many HISAs can you fit it one bed?

Me with the squids (AKA: Ariel with Ursula)

Looking at the stars with Lynne, Michelle, and Nia at the Gate of Apollo

Last time riding on the ferry; Port of Paros

Napping on Naxos

Nia and Lynne in the cafe we stopped to got cappuccinos at

Getting lost on Naxos

This was the last off-island hoorah for the HISA group.

We're all starting to realize that we're nearing the end. Discussions about what our next steps will be. What we'll miss most. The amazing relationships we've had here. The unexplainable experience and changes we've made.

The common denominator of all of these conversations has been this: something profound happened in all of us, here. We're not sure how we're going to explain it to our friends and family back home. We're not sure how we'll feel about leaving. And we're not sure what we're going to do without this island, or each other, to encourage, inspire, and grow us.

But we know that we'll be alright. And that we're going to enjoy   e v e r y   l a s t   s e c o n d   here. Because that's all we can do.

Forever Paroikia

I have never been happier.

I know people say that. I know I've said that. But this time is different.

I don't have all the money in the world. I'm not with the ones I love. I don't have a lot of worldly possessions in my reach. I'm not, at all, sure of my future.

But I have the realest peace of mind. The truest joy. I am the most calm and content Arielle I've ever seen.

It took having the most heated confrontation with the One I love the most, to get here. But that anger and frustration is what fueled this fire. This fire of humility and joy and gratefulness.

I am so grateful.

Nothing matters, other than each day I'm given. I'm not anxious for the future. I don't dwell on the past. I don't hold myself to impossible standards that only lead to guilt and self-deprication.

All I see is the day in front of me. Everything else...is smoke.

And I could not be happier.

These months. This island. This experience. These people. They've changed me. My relationship with this place has been loving and hating. Pushing and pulling. Giving and taking. I am forever changed. For the better.

There will always be a place in my heart for Paroikia. For this school that taught me how to learn and how to live; more than any class I've ever taken in America. For the view of the shorefront and Market street when I'm walking to class everyday. For the local shopowners who will sit and have three-hour conversations with me. For the heart to hearts I have with the friends, who were only strangers a short while ago. For the hurricane-like winds that blow everything to shreds but sing me to sleep every night. For the tears cried and the words yelled. The falling in love while being 5,200 miles apart. The fear of not being sure of myself. The challenge to write what I know; all that I know. The white buildings that are blinding in the sunlight. The sound of the ferry's horn at the port. The way of life in Paros.

For the brief moments of divinity.

I'm different.
I didn't think it would happen.

Fall Brrrrr-eak

Hello blog-followers, study abroad potentials, and anyone else who may or may not be reading my free-associative thoughts here:

I know it's been awhile since I've blogged. Why, you ask? I'm not sure. I guess I could say that I've been busy with exams, studying, and homework, but let's be real.

I'm not exactly bombarded with loads of schoolwork, here. It's more the intellectually and creatively stimulating environment that I'm constantly surrounded by that's so time-consuming. The conversations. The art being produced. The subtle lessons learned in class. The vibe of the island. There's just so much to consider.

And this past week, I've been alone. Literally. The rest of the students went to Istanbul for the week.

It's been a nice break. Without classes. Without anyone else in the apartment complex. I've had a very relazing week filled with resting, watching movies, laying on the beach, shopping, meeting new people, walking around Paroikia, enjoying the beauty in being still.

I think I needed this week to revamp my spirit. I needed time to refocus my energy and attention, so that I could be fully present and attentive in these last eight weeks abroad. And, in doing so, I've been able to grow so much. In every possible way.

I've realized that putting pressure on my time here to be this magnificent transformation that I'll never be able to revisit is ridiculous. I mean, a huge part of this experience and living here are the struggles. The obstacles. The hardships. All of those battling thoughts in my head that I think are distracting me and making me "lose out" are part of what makes up this time. Getting through those thoughts. Piecing together ideas and hopes and realizations.

In hindsight, I'm sure I'll look back on these months and realize, "Wow, those were the hardest, most strengthening months of my life. But I wouldn't have changed one thing about them." So, if I know I wouldn't change anything about my time here, why should I get so wrapped up in trying to control it now?

And that's what I've been so busy with these past two weeks. Not studying or homework or taking adventures. But learning. I've been learning how to stop trying to conduct a life I think is right. Or make choices that I think I should be making. Or being the person I think is the best version of myself.

Simply learning how to live. How to just breathe and know that it's all taken care of. All I have to do is breathe (and sleep and eat and drink water and exercise occasionally). Though this seems like an obvious understanding to most, I find it difficult to obtain.

Being still is hard. Just living is hard. But that's what I've been doing. And that's what I'll continue to do.

~~~

In between all that living, here's a recap of my last two weeks:

Zack Welsh and me dressing up as Ares and Aphrodite

for our Goddess presentation

Michelle, Mariana, Anna, Cat, Grace, and me

at Garden Apollon Restaraunt for dinner

Sitting at Dodoni's waiting for class to start

Watching The Notebook with Lynne and Isabel on a rainy day

Resting on Market Street with my grandparents and Sonja

My yummy Greek salad that I made for dinner

Rain Down On Me

It's raining in Paroikia tonight.

Definition of a perfect day:
Wake up leisurely. Watch some American TV for the first time in weeks. Relax with a few good friends. Watch The Notebook in cloudy weather. Have dessert with a local, shopowner and learn about his life. Walk around town in the rain at night.

Walking around the beautiful, lit-up streets in the rain is unmatchable. I got coffee at the port and walked around Market Street, listening to music. The perfect way to end a perfect day. Plus, there was just an island-wide blackout.

I love stormy weather.

This place is one of a kind. I'm so blessed and happy to be here. I will take it with me always.

A Reoccurring Theme

In almost every conversation I've had, in the last few days, we've spoken of our mind's ability to comprehend the world.

Heavy stuff, right?

Whether it was involving: A. the increasingly irritating "living in the moment" B. our linear view on time and responsibilities C. our relationship with something outside of our own understanding; it was always leading back to our minds. How we view our lives. Our capabilities. Our interactions. Our passions.

I think some of us are off the mark. Most of us.

It's been so ingrained in us that this strict format of a life is the only way to go about it. You're born. You go to school for 16+ years. You get a job. You get married and start a family. You hopefully retire before you die. And, occasionally, you save up enough money to throw in a few vacations.

That's so off. And, frankly, it terrifies me.

While, yes, guidelines help us maintain structure and maybe even sanity. Guidelines also limit us. They tell us what we have to do and what we can't do. But who wants to be told they have to make this much money or they're a failure? Or that they'll never be able to accomplish this because it's simply not practical?

I know it seems like I'm getting off on tangents, here. But these things connect. I'm a list-maker, so here's one for you.

A. Living in the moment. I hate this phrase. It's loaded. There's constant pressure to make sure that you fully take in your surroundings and your experiences. If we're ever able to only be in the present, however, there's not a lot of room for imagination and excitement for what's to come. Heck, that's where artists get their inspiration. Imagining the future or being enchanted by the past. It's not to say that being presently aware is foolish, by any means. I just think there's a difference between "living in the moment" and applying those constant thoughts (on the past and future) to the moment.

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B. Linear view on time and responsibilities. If you were born in America, which all of you reading most likely are, than you're aware of the mindset focused around time. Busy, busy, busy. Always working. Always filling time gaps with more tasks. By the time Saturday rolls around, you're too exhausted to live. Or maybe you don't even get a Saturday. But who's to say that time has to be so...so focused. So future-driven. So revolved around the idea of what's next? Why is it so hard for us to think of time, less like numbers on a clock, and more like...
this energy that graces us with opportunity. I know I've just lost some of the cynics. I haven't turned into a herb-loving hippie, Mom. I'm just entertaining the idea that there's more to time than we can see. Some might call this energy God. God allows us this "time" to take opportunities. To make changes. To affect others. Love others.

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Stick with me, here. I promise, this is where it all ties together.

C. Relationship with something outside of our own understanding. This God that gives us time to live in the moment wants us to make better use of ourselves. I don't believe in a God that wants me to limit myself to a lifeplan because it's more realistic, responsible, and practical. I don't believe in a God who wants me to feel guilty when I let moments pass without being able to recall every speck surrounding me. But I do believe in a God of grace. Love. Joy. Respect. I believe that my God graces me with the abilities and opportunities to love others in ways that evoke joy and respect. My God's time is so different from what I've grown up to understand. It's not 24 hours that make a day worthy. It's the thoughts and actions that make the day mean something. That make our lives mean something.

I don't think I'll be on my deathbed wishing I'd been more practical in getting that one job or regretting not double-majoring in college. What I hope I'll be saying is, "I'm so grateful that God allowed me to love every day of my life. And, to my fullest ability, that's what I did. I was perpetually loving."

~~~

I'm not sure if this makes sense to anyone besides myself. But I hope you got something out of it.

Something that will make you stop in your tracks. Evaluate your life. And think about what drives you. Why do you get up at 6:30 every morning? Why do you work yourself into the ground week after week? What are you working towards? A degree? Retirement?

What if that day doesn't come? What if right now was your final moment? With fear of sounding cliche and terribly cheesy, we're not promised tomorrow.

I'll end this long, possibly incoherent rant (I apologize) with a stanza from Wislawa Szymorska's poem Nothing Twice.

Why do we treat the fleeting day

with so much needless fear and sorrow?

It's in its nature not to stay;

Today is always gone tomorrow.

With new ideas and humble thoughts--

Serenity in Santorini

Just got back from Santorini for the weekend. Words cannot describe how beautiful this island was... so I won't let them.

Waiting for the breath-taking sunset in Oia, Santorini

Swimming in the Volcano Crater after cliffjumping with my friend Kerri

Random, live Greek music and free pastries in Oia

the top of the hill on our 4 hour hike to Oia, with Lynne and Kerri

The beautiful Oia, Santorini

The hiking group at the castle in Oia

The awesome donkey I got to ride in Oia

The more I try to sum this weekend up into words, the more humbled I get by this experience. I can't even begin to verbalize how thankful, happy, and blessed I feel. There was so much beauty in everything I got to see and feel and hear and touch.

Saturday in Santorini was unmatchable. There was endorphins in the four mile hike I got to do. There was peace in the moments I got by myself. There was joy in the music I got to hear, the food I got to eat, and the donkeys I got to ride. There was beauty in the sunset I got to watch and the town I got to explore. There was adrenaline in the cliffjumping I got to do into the volcanic crater. There was love in the people I was with and the people that I met.

But most of all...there was gratitude.

There was humility.

At dinner, I was sitting and taking it all in. I realized that I had lived in the moment the entire day. I hadn't thought about anything other than what I was doing in each moment. It was something so simple, but I was so grateful for that.

I was so grateful for the freedom in only thinking of the present. Being in the present. Taking it all in. Step by step. Breathing in the smells. Seeing the details in the sights. Hearing each note of the music being played. Feeling each flower and drop of water. Tasting every bit of food. Embracing the love of everything and everyone around me.

Santorini was magical. I'm in a complete state of awe, humility, and gratitude for my experiences here. For my growing heart, spirit, and intellect. For the love I'm experiencing in so many different facets.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

That's all I can really say...though, it will never be enough.